When I was 19 I had a fake ID.

Bored one night, drove up to some schithole in South Tacoma.

First lapdance from some asian b*tch, she gets up and splits, I reach down for my wallet and its gone.

I started panicking looking on the floor, then it dawned on me WTF just happened. I raised unholy cain. I made damn sure to say "Fuggin' bitch picked my pockets!!" loud enough to be heard above the Unch-Unch music they played there. I had a 250lb bouncer standing over my teenage 6'00"125lb scrawny ass but I didnt care. I was sober and was threatening to call the pigs. Those whores that ran that place gave me this and that and the run around. I told them they had 5 minutes to return it or I was calling 911. After 30 seconds it magically appeared..."found in a trashcan"...with every penny accounted for.

Then the C*nts tried to hold it from me and demand a "reward." Needless to say they didn't get one and I haven't had a lap dance since.

Oh, and PS fellas, when I used to work in Casinos the Chippendales used to come through once a year. If you knew what those guys did you'd think long and hard about your wife attending. They ain't gay and they don't 'just dance.' I used to know the guys up in surveillance.