In the original version of Peter and the Wolf, Peter shouts, "WOLF! WOLF!" over and over. The villagers look once, or twice, and then ignore him. The story ends on a happy note when the little pr!ck gets devoured by a wolf.

In the modern version, Peter repeatedly posts "Look dimwits, we're surrounded by azzhole wolves. They're everywhere, but your too stupid to see them!" The villagers look, but finding no menace, some of them respond by telling Peter, "Fuk off!" or "Fuk the wolf you rode in on". Most of the villagers ignore him.

Undeterred, Peter continues to post his warning around the clock. One day, in a frenzy of keyboarding, his chair falls over, he gets tangled in the cords of his computer and dies of auto-erotic asphyxiation. Only a few of the villagers go to Peter's funeral, and that's only because they have funeral leave to burn.

Disclaimer: Peter and the Wolf is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the main character of the story and David Carradine is coincidental and unintentional.