Presidential Candidate Large Meteorite has selected its VP! In a close call, Representative Yellowstone Super Volcano (I–Wyoming) beat out the well qualified and oft admired Category 5 Hurricane (I-FL). I was personally hoping it would be our local hero, Tsunami (I-WA), but I am hearing Tsunami will at least be considered for a cabinet position. Maybe Secretary of the Interior?

On the flip side of the ticket, Presidential Candidate Fire N’ Brimstone (I-KY) tweeted a response that Rep. Yellowstone is a true faker and that Fire N’ Brimstone was originally for wildfires throughout civilization well before Rep. Yellowstone flip flopped positions. As of this article, Candidate Fire N’ Brimstone is seriously considering tapping Governor Disease N’ Pestilence (I-SC) as its running mate. Governor Disease N’ Pestilence brings a strong track record of success in the Middle East with occasional inroads inside the EU.

Polls currently show a statistical tie of 40 / 39 in favor of Candidate Large Meteorite.

FML.