Well, here's one for you Steelhead Bums:
1. Do your waders sometimes not dry out for months?
2. Does your vehicle often smell like something died in it from the mildewy waders?
3. Does your truck/car have a stash of flies under the seat and glove box, embedded in the headliner?
4. Do you always have a rod and a laundry basket containing your waders, boots and other fishing gear, in your rig?
5. Is the floor of your vehicle usually covered with gravel, pop bottles and dirt from when you drove between rivers with your waders on?
6. Do you have more then one piece of carpet on the floor boards?
7. Have you ever called in sick to go Steelhead fishing?
8. Do you base your vacation plans on whether there is a good Steelhead River nearby?
9. Have you ever been late for a social engagement because the river came into shape?
10. Do you avoid making time commitments in the future for fear that the river is going to be good?
11. Do you have a fly-tying table or desk permanently set up at your house, and is it covered with scraps of feathers, fur and pieces of thread?
12. Does your garage look like a used Fly Fishing Shop?
13. Do you fish more than 175 days a year?
Scoring: Give yourself 5 points for every yes, 0 for every no.
50-65 points: Yes, you are a Steelhead Bum — and a miserable excuse for a human being. This should come as no surprise to you, since you have heard this from every responsible person you know for some time now. There's no hope for rehabilitation; there are no 12-step programs for Steelhead Bums. It is the sad truth that your highest aspiration is to be a Steelhead Bum.
30-45 points: There is some small hope for you, but you are probably doomed to follow the dark path you have chosen all the way to the bottom. Your career and relationships probably have already suffered from the neglect necessary to support this lifestyle.
10-25 points: You have Steelhead Bum tendencies. You may dream of one day becoming a Steelhead Bum, but you aren't quite worthless enough to make it over the hump.
5 points or less: Congratulations, you are not a Steelhead Bum. You are probably a respected member of the community. You may enjoy fishing, but your sense of responsibility prevents you from neglecting your obligations. While you take pride in doing the right thing, you know that at the end of life, no one has ever said he or she wished to have worked more and fished less.
_________________________
Brian
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