Obituary from the London Times

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An Obituary printed in the London Times........


Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:

Knowing when to come in out of the rain; Why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair; and maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).

His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.

It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an Aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, by his wife, Discretion, by his daughter, Responsibility, and by his son, Reason.

He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers;



I Know My Rights

I Want It Now

Someone Else Is To Blame

I'm A Victim

Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.

+1

Dammit Jerry, we're getting old.........

Ouch, but so true in the world we live in today.

i really miss the good old days, when a dad could just flat out slap the schit out of a child, having a child rolling thier eyes. or for talking back. the good ole days when a leather belt was used.

Clothes hanger lashing's while trapped in the closet....made me the man I am today.

Thanks Mom.

Mf

My Mom would wack me with the wooden coat hanger--- until the day I reached up when it was on it's downstroke and wouldn't let it go.

There shoulda been a sign somewhere along the route that read.....You are now entering the era of "The Whiny Little Bastards.....No balls beyond this point."

Hey, at least we all get to enjoy the fruits of our labor.

I'm sure there has to be an attorney around here who will help you sue for reparations..

i personaly remember quite fondly getting a old style metal coat hanger across the head. left a welt from my forehead through my hair to the top part of my neck. my mom was a sweetheart mother. this was frequent treatment. quite standard for the time.

"my mom was a sweetheart mother" I hope you didn't find a sweetheart wife just like her.

no the pants is a great mother, textbook awesome mother!

Thank god I wasn't the family bed wetter, he got the vacuum cleaner cord...worst screams I ever listened to....no officer, the neighbor must have over heard the TV set......

Mf

one time my dear mother hauled my younger brother and i into her bedroom. she got out the phone book and called the welfare office.... she wanted them to come pickup her two boys because she didn't want us anymore. this was tramatic because neither my brother or i was even in school yet. my mom had a special way of making us feeled loved.

true story.


now my mom could teach parents these days some serious lessons.

Yep, True story....

Love you mom...RIP....Love Aaron

Mf

Hmmm anyone see an inverse pattern emerging here with regards to upbringing? This would explain KK & Toddbama... raised by lib parents, spare the rod and spoil the child school of thought. Look what it has wrought. Supreme arrogance and steadfast belief in their opinions being the only possible correct ones. And everyone but themselves must be dismissed as stupid or insane.

After the beating's subsided....mother held a steak knife to my throat with Brewer present....(if memory serves me correct, listening to Red Barchetta playing, down stairs)

Looking mother eye to eye, begging her to stick me...she returned the steak knife back to the drawer...

Mf