Reserve a Spot in Heaven

So...I can't be the only one who wonders exactly how most Christian politicians expect to ever get to heaven. I mean, let's be honest here...there certainly ain't nothin' Christian about 'em. They're assholes, in the main, who use their religion as a bludgeon to make money, and the more poor and downtrodden they can step on to do it, the better.

It is, it seems, the Republican ideal.

Since they profess to be Christians, even though I don't think 5% of them exhibit any even remotely Christ-like behaviors, they must know that there are townhouses in Hell with their names already embroidered on the welcome mats, just waiting for them to kick the bucket and move in.

Why, then, would the continue to act much more like little Satans rather than little Angels?

Easy...they must have popped the $13 to buy their spot in Heaven.

http://www.reserveaspotinheaven.com/

Being who they are, I bet they even went the extra mile and popped $15 for access to the VIP areas in Heaven.

I've been wondering for years how those self-described "Christians" ever expected to get into Heaven considering all the heinous things they do...daily...and this must be the answer.

According to the website space in Heaven is going fast, so if you're a Republican Fundamentalist RWWJ, you better whip out that MasterCard and pay up, and fast.

Fish on...

Todd

What Would Todd Do?

I'd buy two spaces...you can never be too sure. After all, we're talkin' 'bout Eternity here.

Fish on...

Todd

God has a paypal account? Is there a platinum club? Do they have strippers?

Already done, KK...I figgered that upon checking out, I could check out both and sell the other spot on eBay.

Fish on...

Todd

Everyone that's supposed to be going to heaven seems to be a total a$$hole I'd never want anything to do with. Besides, Living in Washington all my life, why would I want more clouds for my eternity? I want to go somewhere hot that has sluts, hookers, drinkers, gamblers & druggies.

I visited (Seattle) a few years back - they told me that place is called "SeaTac"

Wow, something I agree on with Todd, KK, and Irie!

Couldn't resist any longer - maybe this is the theme song there as well

http://youtube.com/watch?v=hoibfSWyNMc

Infidel and PROUD of it !

Christian politicians should go straight to hell if there were such a thing. Most of the people around my work that are always causing trouble are the so called "Christians".

Real christians are great, and as rare as a 7x7 elk that follows you back to camp so you can shoot it next to the truck. Maybe not that rare, but rare enough. Unfortunately the other side of that bell curve is populated by the outrageously loud, and belligerently pompous, attention whores. They preach from Revelations and Old Testament, hurl the word "sin" like it was a rock to peg people between the eyes with, and they develop this sneer that makes me want to back over them with a lowrider and turn on the hydraulics.

The real ones, those people you don't see 'cause they are too busy doing whats right, working the soup kitchens, needle exchanges and free medical clinics, volunteering to teach adults to read, or working as a nurses aid in a nursing home and for wages that are insultingly poor, doing the kind of work in a single night that should alone guarantee them a place in heaven. I run into these people on rare occasions, and they might talk about Jesus in a quiet moment, but out of respect for what they are actually doing for the people around them, they earn my attention.

But the louds ones with the startched whites, and over sized silver crucifix, manicured hands, and the bible thats highlighted for them so they know what parts to remember? Those hypocrites go right under the '67 Impala and we turn on the hydraulics.