A classic case of fetal alcohol syndrom. The poor kid will only qualify for WSU. He will either graduate with a business degree and move west of the mountains to where McDonalds are plentiful or an arts degree and a small role in Jackass II. Growing old and gray many years from now remembering that year when the Cougs were ranked. That year when it meant something to be a Coug. That year when he didn't have to hide it.
Oh why oh why couldn't that have been the year, just once, when they didn't have to coug it.