I was brunette till I was abducted... Been in therapy ever since...

no fear... Blondes will get revenge:

Genie and a Blonde
There's this blonde, redhead, and brunette who have been trapped on an island for many years. One day they come across this old lamp and one of them decides to rub it. Poof! Out pops a genie who will grant them three wishes. They figure since there's three of them they'll each get one wish.
So, the brunette went first and said " I miss my family, I want to go home"
"Done", said the genie.
The redhead goes next and says " I'm hot, tired, and bored, I want to go home"
"Done", said the genie.
Now it's the blonde's turn. She says " I wish my friends were back here"