George Carlin once did a bit about baseball vs football:

In football you wear a helmet, in baseball a "cap".

Football games are played in stadiums, domes, and coliseums; baseball is played in a "park".

In football you have a penalty, in baseball you have an "error".

In football you have "sudden death", in baseball you have "extra innings".

In football the winning strategy is a strong offense using aerial attacks and ground maneuvers targeting the enemy's weaknesses. In baseball the strategy is to go "home". Then Carlin would skip across the stage saying he's wearing a cap, going through a park to go home.

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Bless our troops.