fish for brains...i do think its appropriate...any more questions?

sol are u checking into a reb?? or doing on your own i lost my wife to the sh!t but sure glad i stopped drinking did 45 days in rehab been 18 years for me. best of luck to you

I think this is one of the most important things to remember. The people you love and that care about you may be the ones that get the wheels rolling on your recovery, but you have to want to keep them rolling (for you).

Think of alcohol as the snagger with a treble hook and you are the fish. Don't let the snagger play you till you are to tired to fight anymore and give up. Don't let the snagger pull you in and bonk you. You have to break that tweakers 85 pound high vis line and swim to freedom. Its hard though, on your journey there will be many snaggers trying to dig their treble hooks into your side and bonk you and there may be other times where you are caught, but never let yourself get bonked.

Not sure if that makes sense, but it makes sense to me. I wish you luck and hope everything works out for you, Im sure it will.

5 plus years for me just do not i repeat do not give in no matter what.on a plus note i catch way more fish sober.

Substituting one chemical habit for another is pointless. Surrounding yourself with others with chemical dependencies is equally self-defeating.

SOL I know ya ain't no country fan, but there's a song by Rascal Flatts that comes to mind.... here' the lyrics to the first verse:

I've dealt with my ghosts and I've faced all my demons
Finally content with a past I regret
I've found you find strength in your moments of weakness
For once I'm at peace with myself
I've been burdened with blame, trapped in the past for too long
I'm movin' on

I've lived in this place and I know all the faces
Each one is different but they're always the same
They mean me no harm but it's time that I face it
They'll never allow me to change
But I never dreamed home would end up where I don't belong
I'm movin' on....

Wishing you the best, man.

Doc,

Thanks. I think a lot of us can appreciate those lyrics.

TIM/SOL: Hang in there. Haven't seen you on the board, and hope you are in a place where they can help you detox safely.

Like it or not Dude, you're in the prayers of a lot of folks.

Mike

Doc,
We hate Country!!!!

Peace
Superfly

Jimmy Buffett A Pirate Looks at Fourty

Yes, I am a pirate two hundred years too late.
The cannons don't thunder there's nothin' to plunder
I'm an over forty victim of fate
Arriving too late, arriving too late.

I've done a bit of smugglin'
I've run my share of grass.
I made enough money to buy Miami,
But I pissed it away so fast,
Never meant to last, never meant to last.

I have been drunk now for over two weeks,
I passed out and I rallied and I sprung a few leaks,
But I've got to stop wishin',
Got to go fishin', I'm down to rock bottom again.
Just a few friends, just a few friends.

Instrumental

I go for younger women, lived with several awhile
And though I ran away, they'll come back one day.
And still could manage a smile
It just takes awhile, just takes awhile.

Since you wanna talk music - it's another country song, search for and listen to Kenny Chesney's "The Good Stuff".

Hey Sol
get involved with your kidsand wife! (not saying you aren't) but they will lead you through this...

Well, it's Christmas eve and since I haven't tuned in for a while, I decide to take a look and............THIS!! Whodathunk?

I'm only kidding, SOL. Been sober since 2/5/87. Was 39 at the time. I didn't lose much because of my drinking....I just chose drinking instead. First six years I was married to a drunk who couldn't stay sober and finally had to choose to go another way. I just about lived in AA for the first 10 years and it was tough sometimes. It wasn't my worst thinking that got me there...it was my best...and it wasn't where I set out to end up either. Oh well. I'm a clean and sober alcoholic and I haven't had a drink today...another miracle. One day at a time seems to best describe how it's been for me...sometimes one minute at a time. I have had good friends literally "babysit" my ass during especially tough times...not often, for sure, but at key times. There is no doubt in my mind that I would long since have been dead, insane, or in prison by now had the urge to drink not been removed.

Ugly fact for you...most don't make it. I had to do it for me. I've had people say, "I wish you drank." The idiots never knew me drunk. It's my sobriety, no one else's, and AA, for me, was about tools....the tools that worked, when the best I had didn't.

If you want it, you can have it...that's a promise. Merry Christmas, Tim.

WOW.....First I'd like to say thank you to all my friends and those of you who have come out of the woodwork in support of my decision.

I've thought about alot over the last couple of days. First of all, am I really an alcoholic? What is an alcoholic? Half my friends are telling me I'm not and the other half are telling me I am. It really doesn't matter. I now clearly see that alcohol was contributing to my marriage problems and was influencing the way I was treating my wife and kids in a negative way. I quit drinking because I choose to put my family first. I can't say it will fix everything but I'll have a clear conscience where booze is concerned if it doesn't.

Having quit for just a couple of days it has become very clear to me that alcohol has been running my life for a long time. This weekend is the first weekend I've not been drunk at least one of those weekend days in over 25 years: Eye opening to say the least. I just spent two days in Forks steelhead fishing and it was the first time in as long as I can remember that I fished through the afternoon without thinking about getting back to the truck at 4:00 PM to mix a drink. Clearly, I have an alcohol problem.

The comment was made that everyone is different. I agree. For me alcohol consumption has been a progressive disorder. Primarily beer in the early years, followed by the stronger micro-brews. About 7 years ago I started drinking hard liquer. During the last 3 or 4 years I've been drinking about three half-gallons of booze per month. It was obviously only going to get worse. For me, I think recovery will be as easy as making the decision to quit. We'll see. If I feel like I'm going to relapse I'll seek professional help at that time.

My friends that drink? I truly believe that one of the biggest problems people have is pushing their limitations off on others instead of taking responcibility for their own actions. I refuse to be one of them. My friends can do as they please and I'll continue to treat them as I always have. I may bow out of evening parties a little earlier to avoid being annoyed by their drunken behavior, but it won't be because I'm worried about relapsing in their presence.

The topic of weed has come up. It's been a part of my life forever. I had some issues with it when I was a teeneager. Lack of motivation and direction, etc. I believe developing adolesants have enough difficulty finding their interests and passions in life without clouding the big picture. As an adult, for me anyway, its been like good background music. I've negotiated my way through a couple of carrier choices in life including 5 years of college in attaining an engineering degree. I passed the P.E. exam the first time through, and it's never once gotten between me and my family or hampered my abitility to accel at everything I've ever done. Literaly, tt's part of who I am. My creativity, my sence of humor, my personality all reflect the contrast in feelings and emotions brought on by an occational puff on the fish-whistle. There's not a single one of you out there that also burn (about half of my friends do and half don't) that can argue with the fact I am a "light" smoker of Mary Jane.

I don't do it before or at work and I keep it away from my kids. That said, IF I feel like my use of it begins to fill some sort of a self-medicating gap left by quiting alcohol, I'm at a point where I could quit that too without a second thought. I just don't see that happening, but at this time I'm taking things one day at a time.

For those of you that can't seem to look beyond the label and see people based on the merits of who they are, how they act and what they've accomplished, I submit to you that the "problem" is yours. With the exception of a core group of friends I've always kept my use of weed a secret, because people have always treated me differently once they knew. At 41 years old I see no value in the friendship of those that feel this way, so about a year ago I let all my friends, my family, and my bosses know and thay are all cool with the real me, not the person they wish me to be.

I know many of your opinions will vary and I do not wish to debate my philosophy with those that do. Once again, it's one day at a time for this kid and I want to thank everyone for caring.

Thank you Sol for an insightful and well thoughtout response to all the comments made in this thread.

I think Sol's post is a perfect way to end this thread.

Sol if you disagree and would like this post re-opened, please PM me.

Good luck in your quest.

Randy