Dear Todd Ripley,

I am Barrister Victor Malu(Esq), a solicitor of law.Personal attorney to late Mr.Robert Ripley, who was a contractor with European Development company. Herein after shall be referred to my client. On the 11th of September 2001 my client was among the people that was involved in world trade center bombing. Unfortunately he lost his life three month after the incident due to injuries he sustained from the bombing, since then I have made several inquiries to your embassy to locate any of my client extended relatives but this has proved
unsuccessful.

After these several unsuccessful attempts, I decided to track his last name to locate any of his relatives hence I have contacted you to assist in repatriating the fund valued at US$10.5 million left behind by my client before it gets confiscated or declared unserviceable by the Finance Security Company in Lome/Togo where this huge amount was deposited in a trunk box under the coverage of family valuables. The said security company has issued me a notice to provide the next of kin or have this box confiscated within the next twenty one official
working days as they don't know the content of the box. Since I have been unsuccessfully in locating the relatives for over two (2) years now, I seek your consent to present you as the next of kin to the deceased,so that the proceedings of this box can be transfer to you.

Therefore, on receipt of your positive response, we shall then discuss the sharing ratio and modalities for transfers as I have every necessary information and legal documents needed to back you up for claim. All I require from you is your honest cooperation to enable us see this transaction through. I guarantee that this will be executed under legitimate arrangement that will protect you from any breach of the law.

Please reply through this email box only (victormalu11@hotmail.be ) for more details.

Thanks and God bless.
Barrister Victor Malu(Esq)
00228-8210411

What's the first thing you're going to buy with all that money?

I know one day I'll wake up and be that lucky!!

Keith

Must of been in the air today. I got this one this afternoon:

Dear Counsel,

My Name is Tatsuo Ikeda, President of Nippon Koshuha Steel Co., Ltd. Nippon Koshuha Steel is a special steel manufacturing company in Japan, located at 8F TMM Building, 1-10-5 Iwamoto-cho, Chiyoda-ku, Tokyo, 101-0032 Japan. We have a claim against a company in your country for breach of contract. We seek legal counsel to assist in collecting funds owed us from this customer. We believe that by retaining local counsel in our company, this customer will pay us sums owed in order to avoid litigation. We stand ready to provide all supporting documents to substantiate our case for settlement or litigation purposes. Should you wish to pursue this matter with us, please send your retainer agreement with a schedule of fees and any otherinformation that you deem necessary by return e-mail. P.S. If you are unable to represent our company, please be so kind as to refer us to a reputable firm or individual practitioner that will be able to assist us. Thank you in advance for your assistance in this matter. May I expect to hear from you shortly.

Regards,Tatsuo IkedaPresident, Nippon Koshuha Steel Co., LtdEmail: nipponksteel@msn.com

S-Dub, I'll represent Nippon Koshuha, you and I will split the fees, and we'll both be rich!

Keith, I think I'll go to Disneyland.

Or fishing.

Or work

I think I'll work for another day or two, then go fishing...fukk Disneyland.

Fish on...

Todd

Saaaweet

Todd,

Timeout... I keep going through life every day looking for a break... Why you and not me? I just don't get it...............

Can you kick down a little?

Keith

Keith, as soon as the 10.5M check clears, I'll book two trips with you, send the money, and then I won't show...go ahead and re-book the days..



If'n I were to buy your hostage reel, Hank, I'd keep it for myself...and you'd be right where you are now, wondering how yer going to "redistribute" $300 of KK's money to yourself...you socialist.

Fish on...

Todd

P.S. Possession is 9/10 of the law...though strangely enough, after three years of law school and also during the intervening 12 years, I've never actually seen a legal precedent for it.

The Esquire is showing considerable restraint keeping his hands off of your $10.5 million stuffed box. Think he slips a $20 out every now & then to get some rum to calm himself ? That old Togo trunk must whisper to him @ all hours........


Assist in repatriating the fund valued at US $10.5 million left behind by my client in Togo where this huge amount was deposited in a trunk box



Better jump on it Todd, your stash is getting smaller, that man is a damn thief




c/22

You guys quit hijacking my "I'm Rich!" thread...this is, after all, all about me.

Fish on...

Todd

Yeah, just got done checking all my emails and still nothing...... I can't catch a break but I'm anxiously waiting...

Keith

When is it not!

That's mighty decent of ya' Hank. Although I have more reels than I know what to do with, and have several that have never even had line on them, I always need "just one more."

Sg

That's one of the better zzzzzzzzzzings of recent times...

Good read...

Keith

Got my popcorn on this one...

In case y'all have not see this stuff before it's PRICELESS -- folks catch scam artists like these (sorry to break the news, Todd) and reel' em in... So-called "scam-baiting"... 419 refers to the country-code of Nigeria where lots of these scams originate..

http://419eater.com/

Here's a particularly good one in which the "baiters" manage to convince the scammers to make a wood carving, and to re-enact the Monty Python "Dead Parrot" sketch in full, and send it back in video form.

FUNNY: http://419eater.com/html/bigman.htm

Here's a similar long-form story from the NPR radio program "This American Life" which about the first half hour (minus the intro on hockey players) is all about one long form scam-baiting... Awesome (use the STREAM option, which is free, and skip to 5:30 mark):

http://www.thisamericanlife.org/radio-archives/episode/363/Enforcers

I'm a big fan of Shiver Metimbers. I remember when he had eth one gut draw the stick figure. Awesome!

Are you saying I'm not rich, IR?

What a letdown.

Fish on...

Todd

What about these?

Dear Sir/Madam , This is to officially inform you that we have verified your Contract/Inheritance file presently on our desk.We found out that you have not fulfilled the obligations giving to you in respect to your contract payment. Secondly, you are hereby advised to stop dealing with some non-officials in the bank as this is an illegal act and will have to stop if you so wish to receive your payment immediately. After the Board of director's meeting held in Abuja,we have resolved in finding a solution to your problem. We have arranged your payment through our SWIFT PAYMENT CENTRE(UBA BANK). This is part of an instruction/mandate passed by the Senate inrespect to overseas contract payment and debt re-scheduling. You will be provided with access to an online account in which your funds, Five million Unites States Dollars($5,000,000.00); will be deposited. As soon as you have been provided with the online account details, you can login to the banks website and then transfer your funds to your designated bank account. If you like to receive your fund this way, Kindly reconfirm your (1) Your Full Name:(2) Full residential address:(3) Phone And Fax Number:(4) Age:(5) Occupation: We shall be expecting to receive your information as you have to stop anyfurther communication with anybody or office aside our. NOTE : YOU ARE TO SEND YOUR RESPONSE TO THE E-MAIL ADDRESS BELOW, janestevens1616@yahoo.cn Thank you for your co-operation. BEST REGARDS, Mrs Jane Stevens.Contact Email: janestevens1616@yahoo.cn +(234)-806-615-4068 CC: CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIACC: SENATE PRESIDENTCC: ALL FOREIGN PAYMENT OFFICESCC: BOARD OF DIRECTORS [CBN]CC: ACCOUNTANT GENERAL OF THE FEDERATION

**************

MY DEAR FRIEND, I KNOW THIS WILL COME TO YOU AS A SURPRISE BECAUSE YOU DO NOT KNOW ME.I AM MR STEPHEN ADAMS, I WORK IN THE ECO-BANK COTONOU,BENIN REPUBLIC OF WEST AFRICA, AUDITING AND ACCOUNTING DEPARTMENT,I GOT YOUR CONTACT IN MY SEARCH FOR A HONEST PERSON THROUGH ONE OF MY COLLEAGUES HERE IN THE ECO-BANK WHO SAID THAT I CAN CONFIDE IN YOU. I WANT YOU TO HELP ME CLEAR THIS BOX THAT IS ALREADY IN OVERSEAS WHICH I SHIPPED THROUGH OUR ECO-BANK ACCREDITED SECURITY COMPANY AGENT BUT THE CONTENTS OF THE BOX IS ($20,MILLION UNITED STATE DOLLARS) ALL IN $100.00 BILLS, BELONGING TO OUR LATE CUSTOMER WHO DIED EARLIER THIS YEAR, BUT THE SECURITY COMPANY DOES NOT KNOW THAT IT IS MONEY THAT MY LATE CLIENT HAVE IN THE BOX. ALL I WANT YOU TO DO FOR ME NOW IS TO FORWARD TO ME THIS BELOWINFORMATION, YOUR CURRENT/PRIVATE MAILING ADDRESSYOUR PRIVATE PHONE AND FAX NUMBER AND I HOPE THAT AT THE END OF THE DAY,YOU WILL HAVE 40% AND 60% WILL BE FOR ME AND MY COLLEAGUES.MY IDENTITY MUST NOT BE REVEALED TO ANYBODY. IF THIS ARRANGEMENT IS OKAY BY YOU RECOMFIRM YOUR DELIVERY INFORMATION SUCH AS, YOUR FULL NAME?YOUR HOME ADDRESS? YOUR COUNTRY?YOUR TELEPHONE NUMBER?YOUR AGE? YOUR OCCUPATION? PLEASE EMAIL ME AT ( stephenadamss@hosanna.net ) FOR SECURITY REASONS OTHER MODALITIES WILL BE DISCUSSED AS SOON AS YOU GET BACK TO ME INCLUDING SENDING YOU THE CONSIGMENT BOX CODE NUMBERS TO OPEN THEM. NOTE: COMMUNICATION SHOULD BE STRICTLY THROUGH E-MAIL OR PHONE FOR SECURITY REASONS. YOURS FAITHFULLY, MR STEPHEN ADAMS.PHONE;+22993959153E-MAIL; ( stephenadamss@hosanna.net ) IMMEDIATELY YOU RECEIVE THIS MAIL AND FEEL THAT YOU WILL ASSIST ME IN THIS MATTER, SO THAT WE CAN DISCUSS ON HOW TO GET THE CONSIGNMENT BOX OF MONEY DELIVERED TO YOUR ADDRESS LET ME KNOW.

************

YOUR OUTSTANDING PAYMENT (VIA CASH DELIVERY)This Is To Notify You That After Our Meeting Today With The President, Accountant General Of The Federation, Office Of The Senate House, And House Of Representatives We Came To A Conclusion That We Have To Pay You The Sum Of Us$10.7 Million As Your Contract Entitlement. The Payment Will Come To You Via Cash delivery; Therefore You Are To Re-Confirm The Following 1.Your full name 2. Full address 3. Direct Phone 4. Occupation,5.age,Nearest airport:Yours Sincerely,Dr.Sanusi Lamido‏

****************




Dear Friend,
I am Mrs. Irina Gustavo, a devoted christian from Iceland who was married to Late Engr. Philip Gustavo {PhD} who worked with MULTINATIONAL OIL COMPANY EXXON AS A DRILLING RIG SUPPLIER in Saudi Arabia for 19 years before he died on the 25th of August, 2008. Before his death, he deposited the sum of 6,143,728.00 US Dollars with a bank In Canada.
Recently, my Doctor told me that I would not last for the next eight months due to cancer problem. Having known my condition, I decided to donate this fund to a church, organization or good person that will utilize this money in good faith by setting up a charity organisation.
I took this decision because I don't have any child that will inherit this money and I kept this deposit secret till date, this is why I am taking this decision. Upon your reply I shall give you the contact of the bank. I will also issue a letter of authorization to the bank that will prove you as the present beneficiary of this money. Please contact me via my email address on the subject.
Await your responds and God bless you.
Mrs. Irina Gustavo
Email: irina.gust1@live.com

****************************

FROM Mr John Nelson E.A.A..S Lottery Headquarters: Customer Service 580 N. Tenth Street Sacramento, CA 85914 Euro - Afro Asian Sweepstake Lottery an Affiliate of Foundmoney International Arena Complex Km 18 Route de Rufisque a I.P.P Award Dept. a Amsterdam Netherland. MICROSOFT WINNING NOTIFICATION We are pleased to inform you of the result of the just concluded annual final draws of Microsoft Lottery Program. Microsoft Lottery Program draws was conducted from an exclusive list of 20,000,000 e-mail addresses of individual and corporate bodies picked by an automated random computer ballot search from the internet as part of our international promotions program which we conduct every year.. No tickets were sold. After this automated computer ballot, your e-mail address attached to serial number 06-3434 drew the lucky numbers 7-17-21-26-37-42, which consequently emerged you as one of first twenty five (25) lucky winners in this category. You have therefore been approved for a lump sum payout of 2,000,000.00 (two Million pounds) in cash credited to file SL/06-GmbH/4009. This is from total cash prize of 50 Million pounds shared amongst the first twenty five- (25) lucky winners in this category. Your funds are now deposited in an offshore bank with a hardcover insurance. Please note that your lucky winning number falls within our European booklet representative office in London... In view of this, our affiliate bank in the Europe would release your 2,000,000.00 (two Million pounds) to you. To begin your claim, you are to choose from the options below: 1.Telegraphic /swift bank transfer. 2.Diplomatic Courier Service. For option one(1),you are to send your name and address in full, phone number. so as to facilitate the release of your funds to your stated local bank account. For option two(2),you are to send your name, phone number,information of next of kin,mailing address(home or office address), so as to facilitate the release of your Funds to your desired address. You are required to send the necessary information as regards your chosen option to our help line below: Dr.Ben Martins EURO AFRO-ASIAN LOTTERY 23 Craven Park, Harlesden London NW10 United Kingdom Information and Payment Bureau Representative Office Email:payment.post@yahoo.com

********************

FROM THE DESK OF MR MIKEL LUGA.
AUDITING AND ACCOUNTING MANAGER,
UNITED BANK OF AFRICA (U.B.A) OUAGADOUGOU-BURKINA FASO.

CONFIDENTIAL TRUST BUSINESS DEAL
I KNEW THIS MESSAGE WILL COME TO YOU AS A SURPRISE. I AM THE AUDITING MANAGER IN UNITED BANK OF AFRICA (U.B.A), OUAGADOUGOU BURKINA FASO. I HOPED THAT YOU WILL NOT EXPOSE OR BETRAY THIS TRUST AND CONFIDENT THAT I AM ABOUT TO IMPOSE ON YOU FOR THE MUTUAL BENEFIT OF OUR FAMILIES.
I NEED YOUR URGENT ASSISTANCE IN TRANSFERRING THE SUM OF (USD$37.6) MILLION DOLLARS TO YOUR ACCOUNT WITHIN 7 BANKING DAYS. THIS MONEY HAS BEEN DORMANT FOR YEARS IN OUR BANK WITHOUT ANY BODY CLAIMING THE FUND.

I WANT THE BANK TO RELEASE THE MONEY TO YOU AS THE NEAREST PERSON TO OUR DECEASED CUSTOMER (THE OWNER OF THE ACCOUNT) BELONGS TO ONE OF OUR FOREIGN CUSTOMER (MR.HATEM KAMIL ABDUL FATAH WHOM UNFORTUNATELY LOST HIS LIFE BY SHOOTING FROM UNKNOW PEOPLE IN IRAQ, YOU MAY READ MORE ABOUT THE INCIDENT ON VISITING THIS BBC NEWS WEBSITE:http://news.bbc.co.uk/go/pr/fr/-/1/hi/world/middle_east/3970619.stm http://www.uslaboragainstwar.org/article.php?id=6979

I DON'T WANT THE MONEY TO GO INTO OUR BANK TREASURER ACCOUNT AS AN ABANDONED FUND. SO THIS IS THE REASON WHY I CONTACTED YOU SO THAT THE BANK CAN RELEASE THE MONEY TO YOU AS THE NEXT OF KIN TO THE DECEASED CUSTOMER. PLEASE I WOULD LIKE YOU TO KEEP THIS PROPOSAL AS A TOP SECRET AND DELETE IT IF YOU ARE NOT INTERESTED.

UPON RECEIPT OF YOUR REPLY, I WILL GIVE YOU FULL DETAILS ON HOW THE BUSINESS WILL BE EXECUTED AND ALSO NOTE THAT YOU WILL HAVE 30% OFTHE ABOVE MENTIONED SUM IF YOU AGREE TO HANDLE THIS BUSINESS WITH ME.
AND 10% WILL BE SET ASIDE FOR ANY EXPENSES THAT ARISES ON THE PROCESSBEFORE THE FUND GET INTO YOUR BANK ACCOUNT SUCH AS TELEPHONE CALLS BILLS (ETC).
REPLY AND CALL

THANK

MIKEL LUGA

*************

I really thought it was my week...my ship had finally come in.

It hasn't?

Fish on...

Todd

P.S. I also can forward about ten dozen emails for free viagra, hot chicks on cam, complimentary gifts from the AARP, and zillion dollar loans that are virtually interest free, if anyone is interested.

KK...

Accurates are worth dang near their weight in Skrunks...


Shoulda kept it

Hank's about as smart as your average conservative, or is it teabagger. When his precious reel finds its way home to him, he first has it checked out in the lab for liberal, socialist, commie contamination. Yet of his own free will, assuming teabaggers have such, which is a lot to assume, but Hank previously seemed above average, he sent his reel into this Puget Sound bastion of chronic liberalism. Jeez, ya' suppose Hank thought it would receive some kind of conservative think tank education here? Coulda' happened if, and only if, he'd sent it directly to Seattle's own laughing stock conservative, Rory Bellows.

Hank, you disappoint me. Kinda' lookin' like KK is right in his harsher criticisms of you. Tsk, tsk.

Sg