A couple I knew in B'ham hit garage sales to buy stuff to resell. They bought a stuffed dog made from curly merino wool so it looked like a real dog thru a dirty car window. They came back to their car on a hot day and a weight-challenged heifer was in tears because their dog was not moving. They told her they were glad it was dead because they hated the little sh!t, got in the car and left. As they drove off, she was in hysterics, screaming and crying about how she had their license number and she was calling the cops. When animal control came by their house, they showed the dude the stuffed toy and he said how disgusted he gets and how much time is wasted because of the bogus reports from the do-gooders.
You are a pillar of self control. I think letting the Moose loose would have been the right thing to do. Lick her into submission.