Nigella starts talking dirty to me and I realize she's just saying food [Bleeeeep!] in an english accent. I bet she [Bleeeeep!] like a screaming banshee behind closed doors.
The only thing you'll be smashing is a crack pipe holding a rock.
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He who joyfully marches in rank and file has already earned my contempt. He has been given a large brain by mistake, since for him the spinal cord would suffice.
WRONG!! You are the one who brings up your latent,closeted,twisted homosexual tendencies on here for all to see. All you ever talk about it other dudes,including Hillary.
Registered: 10/26/10
Posts: 7260
Loc: Snohomish, WA
I can't decide if Giada is super hot or a freak show. She has all of the cooking ingredients for being super hot, but her head and face are just so massive. Her body ratio is all outta wack and her smile scares me. The "plating" is off so-to-speak. I mean - don't get me wrong, I'd totally throw down, but that's only because I have poor standards. That doesn't exclude or exempt her from my above statements.
I'd actually smash Paula Dean too. All sweet, warm and fluffy like a southern biscuit with honey. But she's gonna have to keep me well feed at all times. That's the trade off.
Lastly, SPAM is [Bleeeeep!] delicious and I don't care what's in it. Jalapeno SPAM is a staple in my outdoor kit. Broodbuster and I carried in a 1/2 dozen cans 5 miles during archery Elk season an it was so worth the extra weight. Jalapeno SPAM and fresh Chanterelles all fried up in a skillet is a damn fine meal after a long day of hunting in the rain. Fvck you Mountain House!
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“If the military were fighting for our freedom, they would be storming Capitol Hill”. – FleaFlickr02
Dan S.
It all boils down to this - I'm right, everyone else is wrong, and anyone who disputes this is clearly a dumbfuck.
Registered: 03/07/99
Posts: 17149
Loc: SE Olympia, WA
Originally Posted By: NickD90
I can't decide if Giada is super hot or a freak show. She has all of the cooking ingredients for being super hot, but her head and face are just so massive. Her body ratio is all outta wack and her smile scares me. The "plating" is off so-to-speak. I mean - don't get me wrong, I'd totally throw down, but that's only because I have poor standards. That doesn't exclude or exempt her from my above statements.
I'd actually smash Paula Dean too. All sweet, warm and fluffy like a southern biscuit with honey. But she's gonna have to keep me well feed at all times. That's the trade off.
Lastly, SPAM is [Bleeeeep!] delicious and I don't care what's in it. Jalapeno SPAM is a staple in my outdoor kit. Broodbuster and I carried in a 1/2 dozen cans 5 miles during archery Elk season an it was so worth the extra weight. Jalapeno SPAM and fresh Chanterelles all fried up in a skillet is a damn fine meal after a long day of hunting in the rain. Fvck you Mountain House!
lol - new board motto?
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She was standin' alone over by the juke box, like she'd something to sell. I said "baby, what's the goin' price?" She told me to go to hell.
Lol.. I'm with ya avid, my old lady got some big ass tiddays and can't cook for [Bleeeeep!]. She can bake though, I'll give her that. She's a fish slayer too..
Registered: 03/08/99
Posts: 3068
Loc: Browns Point,Wa. USA
Originally Posted By: NickD90
Originally Posted By: avidangler
[quote=NickD90] Of course, she's my hand....so....
REDHEAD named Tammi.
Tammi is a CRAZY bitch.
Aren’t they all? Fricken redheads... next time just shoot me.
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In the legend of King Arthur, the Fisher King was a renowned angler whose errant ways caused him to be struck dumb in the presence of the sacred chalice. I am no great fisherman, and a steelhead is not the covenant of Christ, but with each of these fish I am rendered speechless.
Registered: 03/08/99
Posts: 28170
Loc: Seattle, Washington USA
Mmmm...Daddy likes redheads, and likes having at least one in the fold at all times.
Sorry to ruin the thread by pointing out that I have a super hot lady at home who also happens to be an excellent cook...she even sends us along to hunting camp loaded down with home cooked meals.
LOL. I was fully prepared to post a personal preference for the "Great British Baking Show," but upon reading a couple posts, I quickly learned this was NOT a thread about our favorite cooking shows. Indeed, this may be the best confirmation we've gotten in some time that toxic masculinity is still alive and well here. Wouldn't have it any other way.
Shine on, Dark Side!
And yeah... Giada de Laurentis is pretty hot.
Finally, for the weirdos out there who watch cooking shows for the food, and while there's nobody on there I'd like to smash, the Great British Baking Show is really good. I can't bake for chit, but I like watching other people who can. Plus, as with most genres, the Brits just make a damn good cooking show.
Registered: 10/26/10
Posts: 7260
Loc: Snohomish, WA
She's much too smart to actually show up at deer camp. She just sends her delicious treats with Todd and I eat them. As far as camp bitches are concerned, we have Ryley and his whiny man-tits. Not great by any means, but we make do.
And Hank, you'll be happy to know that Jalapeno SPAM & Idaho instant mashers is on the menu for this weekend's Elk camp. Gotta keep the chute lubed from an over abundance of jerky & trail mix. All these fancy Chefs ain't got nothin' on Hormel.
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“If the military were fighting for our freedom, they would be storming Capitol Hill”. – FleaFlickr02
And Hank, you'll be happy to know that Jalapeno SPAM & Idaho instant mashers is on the menu for this weekend's Elk camp. Gotta keep the chute lubed from an over abundance of jerky & trail mix. All these fancy Chefs ain't got nothin' on Hormel.
Lol..I'm dyin over here. Helps all those protein-trail mix pinecones slide out.
Registered: 10/26/10
Posts: 7260
Loc: Snohomish, WA
Yes it most certainly does!
I really learned my lesson before in what I now refer to as the "no good, very bad stick incident". Never fookin' again. I'll just shoot myself on the spot instead.
"A can of SPAM a day, keeps the sticks away".
Learn from me.
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“If the military were fighting for our freedom, they would be storming Capitol Hill”. – FleaFlickr02
Dan S.
It all boils down to this - I'm right, everyone else is wrong, and anyone who disputes this is clearly a dumbfuck.
Registered: 03/07/99
Posts: 17149
Loc: SE Olympia, WA
There's nothing wrong with Spam. Unless you're a pansy ass. I do prefer the low-sodium variant. Regular Spam is a little salty for my liking.
Fry it up, put a couple eggs on top. Easy, filling, and cheap.
Talk sh!t about Spam in Alaska or Hawaii and you're going to get your ass kicked. They take their Spam seriously there.
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She was standin' alone over by the juke box, like she'd something to sell. I said "baby, what's the goin' price?" She told me to go to hell.
Registered: 03/08/99
Posts: 3068
Loc: Browns Point,Wa. USA
Originally Posted By: stam
Originally Posted By: JTD
Aren’t they all? Fricken redheads... next time just shoot me.
But...it's so worth it.
10 years off and on again and I jump right back into that fiery pit of despair if I hadn’t intentionally burned that bridge this time. I think of it like an addiction to heroin (not that I’d know)... the highs are super natural and the lows are all-consuming. I just had to get away.
They are CRAZY tho. It just isn’t good for me. Worth it? Absolutely. I just can’t lie to myself anymore that she is capable of being normal.
BTW She doesn’t cook.
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In the legend of King Arthur, the Fisher King was a renowned angler whose errant ways caused him to be struck dumb in the presence of the sacred chalice. I am no great fisherman, and a steelhead is not the covenant of Christ, but with each of these fish I am rendered speechless.
Aren’t they all? Fricken redheads... next time just shoot me.
But...it's so worth it.
10 years off and on again and I jump right back into that fiery pit of despair if I hadn’t intentionally burned that bridge this time. I think of it like an addiction to heroin (not that I’d know)... the highs are super natural and the lows are all-consuming. I just had to get away.
They are CRAZY tho. It just isn’t good for me. Worth it? Absolutely. I just can’t lie to myself anymore that she is capable of being normal.
BTW She doesn’t cook.
Way too over simplyfied response, but do what makes you happy.
Registered: 10/26/10
Posts: 7260
Loc: Snohomish, WA
Calm down old man. I don't think anyone here is suggesting that SPAM should replace fresh bacon. That would be foolish, illogical and nonsensical. These are words I'd like to think you'd understand, but considering your exhaustive posting history, I'm not so sure, so I'll put it in terms you can understand.
We can all agree that fresh homemade applesauce is pretty sublime correct? But sometimes the "cooks" in your "home" don't have the ingredients or time to make it for you, so you get Motts instead. Motts is a perfectly acceptable substitute for you to gum on. Not as great as fresh of course, but it's good enough after a long, hard day yelling at the clouds. The syphilis has killed off your taste buds anyway, so just dig in and zip it.
Get it now? OK good. Now grab a steel plate and get back in-line before we are forced to call Nurse Ratchet and her magical syringe. After lunch, we'll be playing Chutes & Ladders and Hi-Ho Cherry-O with the ladies from C Wing. Winner gets an extra cup of Motts at dinner. Better bring your A game, because ol' Ruthie and Dorothy are stone cold ringers.
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“If the military were fighting for our freedom, they would be storming Capitol Hill”. – FleaFlickr02
I think Hank missed one of Spam's key attributes. Spam will never replace bacon cuz, well nothin's better than bacon. But even as a smoked meat item, bacon has to be refrigerated. So as a camp food, bacon is only good for shorter hikes. Spam is canned, and does not need refrigeration. So Spam is perfect for camping; it'll keep forever. And no one goes camping that long, what with deer and elk season combined being only a few weeks long. And Spam is even available in small slice packages, so you can cook it up out in the woods, bait a bear, and not have an empty tin can to pack out.
And Avid had it close, except no French's yellow mustard ever never! Yuck, what putrid stuff. Have some class, man. Every classy camp box is equipped with Plochman's stone ground mustard, which has a bit of horseradish, making it the perfect accompaniment to Spam and damn near any kind or piece of camp meat. Except bacon, of course. No civilized person uses mustard on bacon.
Dan S.
It all boils down to this - I'm right, everyone else is wrong, and anyone who disputes this is clearly a dumbfuck.
Registered: 03/07/99
Posts: 17149
Loc: SE Olympia, WA
Originally Posted By: dwatkins
Originally Posted By: Dan S.
I do prefer the low-sodium variant. Regular Spam is a little salty for my liking.
Pansy ass
Well played. I kinda leaned into that one.
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She was standin' alone over by the juke box, like she'd something to sell. I said "baby, what's the goin' price?" She told me to go to hell.
Dan S.
It all boils down to this - I'm right, everyone else is wrong, and anyone who disputes this is clearly a dumbfuck.
Registered: 03/07/99
Posts: 17149
Loc: SE Olympia, WA
Hank doesn't know anything about camp food because he's a pussy city boy.
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She was standin' alone over by the juke box, like she'd something to sell. I said "baby, what's the goin' price?" She told me to go to hell.
Registered: 10/26/10
Posts: 7260
Loc: Snohomish, WA
Originally Posted By: MidWestStlhd1959
Hanker I will be in Willow Creek fishing the Trinity for several days next week. Can we meat up old friend?
Only if you bring a can of Vienna sausages. Hanker won't eat SPAM but he'll gobble up your Vienna sausages with a quickness. It's not that he doesn't like the taste of SPAM, it's because its shape is not in the usual and accustomed form which he so readily accepts. He'll really love you if you pick up one of those gigantic Hickory Farms summer sausages. He'll even leave one of those Strawberry candies on your pillow upon exit.
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“If the military were fighting for our freedom, they would be storming Capitol Hill”. – FleaFlickr02
WDFW X 1 = 0
My Area code makes me cooler than you
Registered: 01/27/15
Posts: 4549
Hankster has gone vegetarian. He prefers oil simmered zucchini, with warts, and a large gourd end. Kinda reminds him of his days at the thoroughbred farm less the preservatives of course.
Registered: 10/26/10
Posts: 7260
Loc: Snohomish, WA
Originally Posted By: avidangler
Originally Posted By: Hankster
Originally Posted By: Dan S.
There's nothing wrong with Spam.
Fry it up, put a couple eggs on top. Easy, filling, and cheap.
Fuk Spam
Eat this bacon-n-egg sammich instead:
Don't try and act like you made that,and that your kitchen looks even remotely that clean and nice.
I would do bad things to that sammich. It looks like it has some sort of chutney or relish. Maybe some sort of a savory tomato or pepper based concoction. Regardless...get in ma' belly.
_________________________
“If the military were fighting for our freedom, they would be storming Capitol Hill”. – FleaFlickr02
Dan S.
It all boils down to this - I'm right, everyone else is wrong, and anyone who disputes this is clearly a dumbfuck.
Registered: 03/07/99
Posts: 17149
Loc: SE Olympia, WA
Dude, SPAM grease is an industrial-grade lubricant. You should have sequestered it in case of societal collapse. I get where you're coming from, though - it definitely doesn't belong in the entrance area of any housing unit at all.
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She was standin' alone over by the juke box, like she'd something to sell. I said "baby, what's the goin' price?" She told me to go to hell.
Registered: 10/26/10
Posts: 7260
Loc: Snohomish, WA
Originally Posted By: avidangler
The only bears Hank has to keep an eye out for over his shoulder are the ones from Sausalito issuing reach arounds.
I'd wager Hank keeps TWO eyes out for those kinda bears. Gaydar pinging 24/7.
I saw on a documentary once that those kinda bears are attracted to fresh sourdough and sweaty old man butt. I think it was narrated David Attenborough.
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“If the military were fighting for our freedom, they would be storming Capitol Hill”. – FleaFlickr02
Its been awhile, but I used to live in Hoopa and there's bears aplenty along the Klamath and the Trinity.
Those bears are tiny compared to a brown,and pretty shy of people. I did have one in Del Loma follow me downriver from the other bank, Made me a little nervous. You lived in Hoopa? Why?