Loses control ?! shocked

I think I would go to Goodwill, pick up a good-looking mattress (without too many stains) and rig it for a 4-point pick.
Then I would park my puckered butt on top of said mattress !

Magic Carpet Ride, hillbilly style.

Edit:
The mattress method can also be used to rescue the helo....
http://www.mysanantonio.com/news/local_n...ing-3764153.php
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NO STEP ON SNEK