#145880 - 03/19/02 04:41 PM
Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Spawner
Registered: 10/18/00
Posts: 683
Loc: Washougal, WA
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Hey everybody, let's have another fun thread! I don't know about you all, but I'm having a craving to hear about some comical 'writings', jokes, or any other humorous tidbits (even longer masterpieces) that you have have found on the walls of porta-potties, outhouses, restaurant bathroom stall walls, etc over the years. I'll start things off with the shortened version of one of my favorite outhouse poems (can't remember the longer version off the top of my head). "Here I sit, broken hearted Came to [Bleeeeep!], but only farted Never try to take a chance Because someday you'll [Bleeeeep!] your pants" Now let's hear some of yours!
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#145881 - 03/19/02 04:52 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Carcass
Registered: 10/31/02
Posts: 2227
Loc: Portland
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We aim to please, you aim too please!
_________________________
"Christmas is an American holiday." - micropterus101
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#145883 - 03/19/02 05:27 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Poodle Smolt
Registered: 05/03/01
Posts: 10979
Loc: McCleary, WA
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"Meat" me here for manly love.
_________________________
"Give me the anger, fish! Give me the anger!"
They call me POODLE SMOLT!
The Discover Pass is brought to you by your friends at the CCA.
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#145884 - 03/19/02 05:37 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Repeat Spawner
Registered: 10/08/01
Posts: 1155
Loc: Out there, somewhere
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Dylsexics untie
_________________________
Hm-m-m-m-m
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#145885 - 03/19/02 07:27 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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I saw this in a Tillamook sh!tter recently: "I'm very lonely. I long for the strong touch of a very masculine man. Come. Come now. Come caress my milk white loins you savage man of my dreams. - Call Stew at 503-***-****" Yikes! I hope it was a different Stew!
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#145886 - 03/19/02 07:38 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Eyed Egg
Registered: 11/29/00
Posts: 5
Loc: Silverdale, Wa
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Here I sit My buns a flexin' just gave birth to another texan :p
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#145887 - 03/19/02 09:23 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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I read this one a the local McDonalds in Cedar Mill. "There once was was a guy named RT whom it was said had to squat to go pee. Because of his large gut and equally big butt. He had to wear pads on his knee" :p
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#145888 - 03/19/02 10:19 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Spawner
Registered: 03/10/01
Posts: 578
Loc: Snohomish, WA, USA
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Davies Hall, CWU: If your hose is short, and your pressure is weak, please stand up close, this ain't cleanup week.
Lind Hall, CWU (math, physics, and geology building): E=mc2. Very nice Albert, but next time, please show your work.
HorseShoe Tavern, Ellensburg: There once was a man from Nantucket.......nevermind.
Call: Here I sit, broken hearted, paid a dime, and only f@rted.
Response: Quitcher b!tchen, you had your chance, I saved the dime, and sh!t my pants.
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#145889 - 03/19/02 10:42 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Spawner
Registered: 10/18/00
Posts: 683
Loc: Washougal, WA
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LMAO at all the posts! RT and Stew--funny stuff. So how did you enjoy that site I give ya guys? Keep 'em comin'!
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#145890 - 03/19/02 11:05 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Juvenille at Sea
Registered: 12/24/01
Posts: 146
Loc: Port Angeles, WA
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Great posts! Great topic. Gawd....anything to change the subject from Vision hooks! "Never raise your hand to your child. It leaves your groin unprotected." diana
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#145891 - 03/19/02 11:20 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Alevin
Registered: 02/10/02
Posts: 17
Loc: Lynnwood
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There once was a man from nantucket who had such a dick he could suck it he said with a grin as he wiped off his chin if my ear was a [Bleeeeep!] i would f**k it.
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#145893 - 03/19/02 11:31 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Smolt
Registered: 08/08/00
Posts: 99
Loc: Marysville Washington
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This goes back to jr high. Well here it goes. When your hot, your hot. When your not, your not. But when your sitting on the pot give it all ya got. J.C.B
_________________________
Fish naked!Its fun, natural and it keeps crowding to a minimum.
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#145894 - 03/20/02 12:05 AM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Alevin
Registered: 01/14/02
Posts: 14
Loc: Central Point Or.
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This was on the wall of a barracks (spelling?) latrine at Ft. Benning a long time ago.
This is a place to void your guts, not a place to bust a nut, so keep it clean, and keep it neat, and go back home to beat your meat.
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#145895 - 03/20/02 03:36 AM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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Good stuff. But geez 'Slayer, I think your's may have pushed the edit envelope? Soon find out, ay? Hey KB, I'll tell ya how that dang nasty site you sent went like. ... Well, I accessed it and every time I clicked on one of those lushious tease pictures it kept sending me to all sorts of other sites and tease pics! Geez, after finally having enough of it I couldn't get rid of them. I wound up clicking them off about the same speed as new ones came up. This went on for awhile until I heard my wife walking down the stairs. I started clicking faster than a hungry dog can eat kibbles. I was just about ready to push the off buttom on my 'puter, but she walks past into the kitchen. Whew! As she starts doing stuff in there she yells to the den, 'what are you up to tonight on there'? I said I was researching a site for a young fisher from the P.P. BB. I just got the last of the X-rated links clicked off as she came in to say goodnight. I replied, yes it will be. And followed her upstairs; with visions of sugar plums dancing in my head - t'was the night before X-mas. ... Great 4 play! For guys anyway.
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#145897 - 03/20/02 07:57 AM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Juvenille at Sea
Registered: 03/31/00
Posts: 216
Loc: Stanwood,Wa
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Above a urinal "Why are you looking up here? The joke is in you're hand!"
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like bannanas.
_________________________
Gettin' old ain't for wimps!
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#145900 - 03/20/02 12:35 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Spawner
Registered: 03/08/99
Posts: 592
Loc: austin, Minnesota, USA
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Crapper at Colonial Park on the Root River:
1. I'm not sschizophrenic. You only think we are
2. Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
For Hey Yall:
On special occasions when you shve under yore arms Well, Im in hawg heaven and awed by yore charms
You have some'a yore teeth for which i am proud I hold my head high when we're in a crowd
_________________________
The best way to be succesful in life is to keep the people who hate you away from the people who are undecided
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#145901 - 03/20/02 02:47 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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The Original Boat Ho
Registered: 02/08/00
Posts: 2954
Loc: Bellevue
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This is one of my favorites. You will have to write it down
Square root of 4b squared
Buy you a beer if you get this one!
_________________________
It's good to have friends It's better to have friends with boats ***GutZ***
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#145902 - 03/20/02 03:18 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Juvenille at Sea
Registered: 03/31/00
Posts: 216
Loc: Stanwood,Wa
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Gutz Is that something from Shakespeare? No ..It can't be that obvious. Bigdog out.....
_________________________
Gettin' old ain't for wimps!
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#145903 - 03/20/02 05:50 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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The Original Boat Ho
Registered: 02/08/00
Posts: 2954
Loc: Bellevue
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Few get that one Bigdog! I have written it on the wall at the Downtown B'vue Mustard Seed and gotten 15 wrong or rambling answers. What'll you be drinking? I am easy to spot. I will be the drunk guy at the Bar.
_________________________
It's good to have friends It's better to have friends with boats ***GutZ***
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#145906 - 03/20/02 06:51 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Spawner
Registered: 04/18/01
Posts: 861
Loc: Milwaukie, OR
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For some reason I carried this one with me from childhood:
There once was a sailor named Dave Who found a dead whore in a cave, She was missing a [Bleeeeep!] And she smelled like [Bleeeeep!] But think of the money Dave saved!
_________________________
Get Bent Tackle whōre. Just added spinner section, where you can special order to your hearts content!
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#145907 - 03/20/02 06:54 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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The Original Boat Ho
Registered: 02/08/00
Posts: 2954
Loc: Bellevue
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Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day, Teach a man to fish and he will spend the rest of his life drinking beer in a boat.
_________________________
It's good to have friends It's better to have friends with boats ***GutZ***
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#145908 - 03/20/02 07:18 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Spawner
Registered: 03/10/01
Posts: 578
Loc: Snohomish, WA, USA
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Originally posted by GutZ: This is one of my favorites. You will have to write it down
Square root of 4b squared
Buy you a beer if you get this one! Gutz, is it as obvious as it appears to be? If you actually read the thing, I mean....
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#145909 - 03/20/02 07:31 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Smolt
Registered: 01/15/02
Posts: 91
Loc: WASHINGTON
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A good nursery Ryhme
It was a dark night at 12 o'clock an around the corner a [Bleeeeep!] wagon flew a shot was fired a screem was heard a cop was killed by a turd.
Also a quote that I most admire. God didnt put me on this earth to live for a long time but I can have a good time.
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#145910 - 03/20/02 07:37 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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The Original Boat Ho
Registered: 02/08/00
Posts: 2954
Loc: Bellevue
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Luke; Put it on a wall somewhere. It will confuse the hell out of them. Most won't even recognize it as a question or something that needs a solution.
_________________________
It's good to have friends It's better to have friends with boats ***GutZ***
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#145911 - 03/20/02 07:56 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Returning Adult
Registered: 07/06/99
Posts: 481
Loc: Seattle, Washington, US
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Scrawled inside my old locker at UW:
"Better rested - better rested"
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#145912 - 03/20/02 08:04 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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River Nutrients
Registered: 03/07/00
Posts: 3009
Loc: Lynnwood, WA
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From the limmerick catalog: "There once was a girl named Jill. Dynamite gave her a thrill. They found her vagina in North Carolina, and bits of her tits in Brazil."
_________________________
A day late and a dollar short...
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#145913 - 03/20/02 08:06 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Spawner
Registered: 09/25/01
Posts: 768
Loc: Tacoma
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Gutz, 2x4? From my childhood as an Army brat either taunting with or being taunted by. Yo Mama, yo Papa, yo greazy Granny got a hole in the panties...got a hairy chest like Jerry West...got a big butt like King Tut...and goes beep beep beep down Sesame Street. And on the Stew and Rt front, a set of twins were interviewed prior to halting simultanious oral sex on the both of them...when asked why they cut the task short they both replied in unison " I smelled asshole" :p FJ...out.
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#145914 - 03/20/02 09:46 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Parr
Registered: 01/23/02
Posts: 66
Loc: Lake Stevens
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In a far way out lonesome town their lived a girl named Molly Brown. She swore no boy could [Bleeeeep!] her down!!
When over the hill came Piss Ball Pete, with forty pounds of swinging meat.
Pete threw Molly gently on the grass, and shoved his pec**er up her a**!
But Molly let out a mighty fart, and blew Pete's pecker all apart.
Back of er the hill went Piss Ball Pete, with thirty pounds of shredded meat.
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#145915 - 03/21/02 12:55 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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The Original Boat Ho
Registered: 02/08/00
Posts: 2954
Loc: Bellevue
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:p
_________________________
It's good to have friends It's better to have friends with boats ***GutZ***
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#145916 - 03/21/02 03:58 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Spawner
Registered: 10/18/00
Posts: 683
Loc: Washougal, WA
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Absolutely lovin' 'em! Funny funny! Here's a few more...all found on sh*tter walls across the US... "Some come here to sit and think, Others come here to [Bleeeeep!] and stink. I come here to scratch my b*lls and read the writing on the walls." "I f*cked your mother last night!" {and right below it in different handwriting:} "Go home dad, you're drunk." "This is where Napoleon pulled his Bonaparte." "Anybody can p*ss on the floor. Be a hero and [Bleeeeep!] on the ceiling." "I've [Bleeeeep!] in England I've [Bleeeeep!] in France But before I [Bleeeeep!] here I'll [Bleeeeep!] in my pants" And not really related to the topic, but here's a pretty funny story I just found on the net. http://www.securenet.net/3rdbn5th/india35/burning_****ters.htm Oh yeah, since the link is automatically censored and it wont go through with a link title either, you have to replace the "****" with the word that's spelled with the letters s, h, i, and well you know the rest. Any others?
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#145918 - 03/21/02 05:47 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Juvenile at Sea
Registered: 09/03/01
Posts: 193
Loc: shelton wa
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I always enjoyed this one " While your reading this you are peeing on your shoe"
The square root of a square is the number so 4b
_________________________
Would you say I have a plethora of fish?
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#145920 - 03/21/02 08:04 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Spawner
Registered: 09/25/01
Posts: 768
Loc: Tacoma
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Saw a license plate frame on a Saturn that read... "This Saturn is ahead of Uranus"
FJ...out.
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#145921 - 03/21/02 09:13 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Returning Adult
Registered: 12/06/00
Posts: 345
Loc: Tacoma, WA,
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From my college days! Mag you hag,you sleazy slimy slut Between your legs green fungus lies And maggots crawl up your bu*t Before I scale those scabby thighs And lick those festered ti*s I'll drink a gallon of buzzard pi*s And die of the jizzling sh*ts.
_________________________
"FISH HARD" ~
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#145922 - 03/21/02 09:26 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Fry
Registered: 03/12/01
Posts: 20
Loc: Oregon City
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Seen at The Log Cabin Pub in Spences Bridge. (Thompson River)
"Kingfishers Blow Dead Bears!"
_________________________
The best head........is STEELHEAD!
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#145924 - 03/22/02 12:52 AM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Juvenille at Sea
Registered: 08/22/00
Posts: 214
Loc: Sequim, Washington
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This came from a portapotty in Port Angeles above a urinal: "The sink is too low and the soap doesn't work." I still don't get the 4b thing . ~ Dr Pepper
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#145925 - 03/22/02 01:13 AM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Juvenile at Sea
Registered: 01/20/02
Posts: 132
Loc: Chehalis Wa
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Cowlitz river bathroom Here I sit all broken hearted Try to sh&t but only farted, then one day I took a chance tryed to fart and sh&t my pant. Man that boys shaken like a dog sh%tin razor blades.
_________________________
Never a bad day of fishin.
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#145926 - 03/22/02 03:00 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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The Original Boat Ho
Registered: 02/08/00
Posts: 2954
Loc: Bellevue
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Two b OR NOT two b 2B-2B
_________________________
It's good to have friends It's better to have friends with boats ***GutZ***
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#145927 - 03/22/02 04:02 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Fry
Registered: 01/12/01
Posts: 26
Loc: Kennewick, Wa. USA
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From the crapper at the truckstop in Biggs, Ore.
Here I sit in all this vapor, took a crap and found no paper, I wonder how long I'll sit and linger before I have to use my finger?
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#145928 - 03/22/02 09:59 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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flush twice, it`s a long way to my office, the plant manager.
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#145929 - 03/23/02 01:17 AM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Fry
Registered: 05/21/01
Posts: 27
Loc: Yakima Wa
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From a resteraunt bathroom near where we duck hunt:
Here I sit on the pooper, giving birth to a Washington State Trooper......
_________________________
Jon
I wanted a sweater for Christmas, I got a screamer and a moaner instead......
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#145930 - 03/23/02 03:24 AM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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River Nutrients
Registered: 02/08/00
Posts: 3322
Loc: IDAHO
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4SALT- that deal about Brazil got huge reviews at work this week... told it once and heard it 6 times:)
_________________________
Clearwater/Salmon Super Freak
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#145931 - 03/24/02 07:03 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Returning Adult
Registered: 10/14/99
Posts: 386
Loc: Orygun
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From the wall in a crapper at NATTC Millington Tenesee, "THOSE WITH SHORT STACKS, AND/OR LOW MANIFOLD PRESSURE, TAXI UP CLOSE". This was over 20 years ago. GRUMPY
_________________________
IT'S NOT THE SIZE OF THE GEAR THAT MATTERS, IT'S THE JERK ON THE ROD.
"I reject your reality and substitute my own"
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#145932 - 03/28/02 09:56 AM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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I copied this one of an Olympia crapper wall: A dad walks into a market with his young son. The boy is holding a quarter. Suddenly, the boy starts choking, going blue in the face. The dad realizes the boy has swallowed the quarter and starts panicking, shouting for help. A well dressed, attractive, but serious looking woman in a blue business suit is sitting at a coffee bar in the market reading her newspaper and sipping a cup of coffee. At the sound of the commotion, she looks up, puts her coffee cup down on the saucer, neatly folds her newspaper and places it on the counter. Then she gets up from her seat and makes her way, unhurriedly, across the market. Reaching the boy, the woman pulls the boy's pants down, carefully takes hold of his testicles, and starts to squeeze, gently at first and then ever more firmly. After a few seconds the boy convulses violently and coughs up the quarter, which the woman deftly catches in her free hand. Releasing the boy, the woman hands the coin to the father and walks back to her seat in the coffee bar without saying a word. As soon as he is sure that his son has suffered no lasting ill-effects, the father rushes over to the woman and starts thanking her profusely, saying, "I've never seen anybody do anything like that before. It was fantastic. Are you a doctor?" "No," she says, "Divorce attorney." --------------- That guy must of had a necessary long sit and/or gone thru a nasty divorce, ay?
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#145933 - 03/28/02 03:27 PM
Re: Poohouse Scriptures - Warning ADULT humor
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Spawner
Registered: 10/18/00
Posts: 683
Loc: Washougal, WA
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