Oh No! Oregon doesn't have a Major League Babies team! Whatever will I do with my summer days if I cannot pay $20 to get to sit in a crappy seat so that I can buy $3 hotdogs and $5 pisswater (or did the prices go up again?)? Hmmm...how about go to Kah-Nee-Tah and soak in the rays over there. Maybe while I'm there I can hit the Deschutes and check out the world-class trout fishing (browns > 15lbs, anyone?).

Oh, and speaking of which...who paid for that stadium up there so those overpaid sandlot boys can play baseball? The team owner? And did they buy you a drink first before they screwed you like that?

Thanks but no thanks. You can keep your under-achieving football team, your choking baseball team, and your out-in-the-first-round basketball team. Heck, take our basketball team too (or do you not have the jail space?). I'll spend my money (tax-free!) on something else.