The neck finally jumps into the pit after the jaws of life were used to remove his head from his @$$. Nice to see him back around instead of around back, if ya know what I mean.

I've had the pleasure of Y'All's company three times now and I've yet to see him catch a fish. Oh wait, I think he might have gotten a cuttie in that zipperlip drainage ditch that he took me to. Certainly not the big bruising slabs-o-silver that he claims to catch. Between the beer and pipe going in and the spit coming out, he probably misses a lot of bites while holding that can of whatever. No wonder he has the beer helmet. Are you able to spit up that hose to make it into the hat? Just make sure you remember which one you're spitting into and which one you're sucking out of. Not that you could taste the difference.

Oh baby I've got so much springer mojo built up right now that the ODFW will have to do an emergency closure after the hurt I'm going to put on those fish. Scott just got hooked up with some SWEET cured prawns the other day that don't all fall apart and sh!t. Best stuff around, baby! If you're nice and one of my Oregon brothas I might hook ya up with where you can pick some up, too. And I will have my source check to make sure you've got an OREGON driver's license. Can't waste the good stuff on the panty-waste-intonians from up north.

Oh, and if anyone is offended by the raging river of smack that flows from the fingers of yours truly, then please go find some calmer waters elsewhere, as we don't want to have to listen to your Mommy when she gets a moniker here and rips into us. Hell, on second thought bring her on. She'll probably lay it down better than you ever could.