This is even funnier when you realize it's real! Next time you have a
> bad day at work think of this guy.
>
> Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in
> Louisiana . He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs.
>
> Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it to radio
> station 103.2 on FM dial in Ft. Wayne , Indiana , who was
> sponsoring a worst job experience contest. Needless to say, she won.
>
> Hi Sue,
>
> Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother.
>
> Last week I had a bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling
> down lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you
> to make you realize it's not so bad after all .
>
> Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you
> with a few technicalities of my job.
>
> As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea.. I wear a suit
> to the office. It's a wet suit. This time of year the water is
> quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel
> powered
> industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the
> water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature.
>
> It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is
> taped to the air hose. Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and
> I've used it several times with no complaints.
>
> What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the
> hose and stuff it down the back of my wet suit. This floods my
> whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi.
>
> Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to
> itch. So, of course, I scratched it.. This only made things worse.
>
> Within a few seconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out
> from my back, but the damage was done. In agony I realized what had
> happened.
>
> The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into
> my suit. Now, since I don't have any hair on my back, the
> jellyfish couldn't stick to it However, the crack of my butt was
> not as fortunate.
>
> When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually
> grinding the jellyfish into the crack of my butt.
>
> I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator.
> His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with
> five other divers, were all laughing hysterically.
>
> Needless to say I aborted the dive. I was instructed to make three
> agonizing in-water decompression stops totaling thirty-five minutes
> before I could
> reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression. When I
> arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet.
>
> As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter
> running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub
> it on my butt as soon as
> I got in the chamber.
>
> The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't sh*t for two days
> because my butt was swollen shut.
>
> So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much
> worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt.
>
> Now repeat to yourself, "I love my job, I love my job, I love my job."